The other day I was trying to drive to the movie theater to watch a horror movie. I did not know the way so I put the address into my GPS and blindly followed its every command. I was confused as to where it was taking me as I did have a general idea of where the theater was and it seemed to be taking me in the wrong direction, but I put my faith in the technology regardless. When I finally got to the address, I found that I was in a park with no theater in sight. I tried to put in the address again as well as the specific name of the theater itself, but again and again it told me that I was already at my destination. I did find my way to the theater by looking up the address of a nearby restaurant, but I missed the first fifteen minutes or so, but that is not important.
What is important is that they say that a GPS is supposed to take you where you want to go, but this strange occurrence got me thinking; where is it that the GPS wants us to go. For me, it would appear that it wanted to take me to that park and was quite insistent upon it. Perhaps it was judging my choice of movie and telling me that really I did not want to go see that movie and that I really would prefer that park. Indeed, I did not enjoy the movie very much and would probably have had a much better evening if I had relaxed in the park instead. It tried to take me where I would have wanted to go had I known better. It reminds me of parents trying to guide their children as a child does not know what they truly desire so adults make some decisions for them such as forcing them to attend school.
I often have trouble finding direction in my own life. I am usually uncertain of where it is that I want to be going and this uncertainty leads me to a state of motionless. Would having a GPS guide me to where it wanted to go give me some kind of direction, some kind of closure? I know that my parents want various things of me, but I cannot bring myself to want the same things. I suppose that could mean that they do not know where I want to go, but I do not exactly know where I want to go either. I need to find a GPS of some sort, though finding one that would be suitable seems nigh impossible. People tell you things all the time. Society tells you things all the time. There are clear things that society values higher than others such as making money, but I do not value those same kinds of things. The GPS would need to know me better than me to be effective, or perhaps just be lucky. I suppose that there is nobody I can depend on but myself for such a task, so I must work to learn more of myself.
When we are lost, and the map is also lost, how then shall we live?