After falling for so long,
I have come crashing down to the ground at last.
My body all but broken,
I look up to the shining sea of stars above,
thinking that now there must be nowhere else to go.
But then the earth beneath me begins to rumble
and I remember that there is still hell below.
“Do you hate me?”
She nodded and said, “No.
I have already forgotten
about all those times that you betrayed me,
all those scars you left on my heart.
The pain has almost faded,
the tears have almost dried.
All those nights you left me crying,
and all those times we said goodbye,
are just the past
and nothing more.”
Are all my words written with water?
Are all these feelings “just a phase”?
Is all that you have been hearing just the silence
of a man screaming for air in space?
She said I locked my heart away,
and she was right.
In this world we live in,
only a fool would leave their front door open.
But I left a spare key under the welcome mat.
Nobody cared enough to look.
I used to think that hearts
were something like long wooden poles,
that they snapped like twigs at the start
but then we could bring them back together in a bundle,
and that bundle would grow thicker
as we pieced back together all those heart breaks
and each time it would grow stronger
until we had an unbreakable fasces.
You showed me how wrong I was,
when you set my heart ablaze.
It burned down in cinders
and the wind blew all the ashes away.
Soul shattered, heart scattered,
what more is left of me?
In my dreams I find myself searching for
a place where both of us belong,
a place where we can be together,
and where we can stay together until dawn.
There are some times that I think I found one,
and for a moment my heart stops to ache,
but then the dreams all seem to turn to nightmares
and they all fade away when I wake.
There is no place for us it seems.
We cannot even be together in my dreams.
I still lie down on the side of the bed
even though I know I will be sleeping alone.
I can still hear the soft sound of your breath
and your voice calling my name echoes through an empty home.